I Am Legend
blog
Title
I Am Legend
Premise
A scientist (evil Emma Thompson) claims to have cured cancer by using a special virus. Unfortunately, there’s the small side-effect of killing 90% of all humans and turning the rest into flesh-eating zombies. All except for Richard Neville (Will Smith, looking strangely Obama-esque), a military scientist who is surviving alone in desolate New York searching for a cure.
Lessons Learned
1) If you want to avoid going mad, don’t watch Shrek too many times.
2) Get into a good routine of doing loads of exercise and reading an Almanack to ensure you keep mentally and physically trim.
3) If you’re going to set traps to catch zombies, remember where you put them, because . . .
4) Cutting the rope and falling to the ground really hurts.
And the upside?
1) Zero population makes it much easier to drive around New York.
2) DVD rentals are now free.
3) More time to work on your pecs (Smith has the muscle definition of a plastic He-Man).
Conclusion
I Am Legend offers meagre fodder for any apocalyptician worth the name. New York would be a fascinating place to scavenge, but Smith spends most of his time driving a car and hitting golf balls. The fact that he is the luckiest twat alive doesn’t help.